"How do you know he's the one?"

"How do you know he's the one...........if you haven't like.... 'done it' yet?"

.....................................................................................................................

This is a question I'm asked all the time.  And the answer just keeps getting easier and easier to give. 

..........................................................................................................................................................

I know he's the one because we don't HAVE to have sex to have love. 

.............................................................................................................

We've been together over a year and a half, and we've kept our commitment to not only ourselves, but to God.  God is not only the person we pray to at night, or the person we visit on Sunday mornings, but the centre of our relationship, and our sense of selves.  A relationship is so much more than just physical attraction, and good sex.  It's about loving one another during the best and worst times.  Our Definition of love is as simple as: Cheap date nights, Half price nachos, cuddles and Netflix on our projector, and sharing our love of Jesus with each other and others.  

So many people think that we need to have sex FIRST, BEFORE marriage, for a multitude of reasons. I, on the other hand, think that our love is perfect the way it is.  We don't need sex to confirm love.  Sure, when we're married that's another story, but why all of the pressure from society to have sex now?

I remember before I met Chris, I was dating someone, nothing serious, and not even 2 weeks into the relationship, my best friend told me I was going to have sex with him.  I was so shocked that she just assumed 2 weeks into a relationship, we couldn't wait any longer.  If not for God, why not for yourselves? Why do so many of us assume that there can't be love if there isn't sex?  I've seen so many of my friends all go down the same road of throwing it away to the first guy who comes around, or giving it up while drunk because "it was bound to happen sooner or later".  And once you've done it, it isn't a big deal any more. The next guy who comes around, he gets you sooner than the last because there's nothing to "give away" any more.   There's nothing special about it.  It's just something you do because it's fun, or it feels good, but doesn't have anything to do with love. 

I'm not here to judge anyone for their choices, I'm just asking you to respect mine.  I'm asking you to imagine how beautiful and special it would be to marry your best friend, and have saved yourself for that one special person who you want to spend the rest of your life with.  I'm so glad that I never gave myself away to the first boy who came around, or even the ones I thought I was in love with in high school.  I'm glad that without preaching, without fear, without force and without even knowing, Jesus touched my heart, and made this my decision.  A decision I made before I even understood why it was so important for my life.